Feisty Repartee

Mom to the Rescue

Wee One returned from a birthday party one afternoon with an array of different brightly colored balloons attached to one arm and her favorite dolly tucked under the other (and, yes, the dolly had initials printed on the bottom of one foot).

This had been her first big birthday party for one of her little friends. She was seriously stoked and could not wait to tell Sweet One all about it and show us the treats and toys she had received as a guest. However, because of the half-dozen or so balloons tied to her, she was unable to tell the story appropriately. (Like her mother, she requires the use of her hands to gesticulate while talking. If either of us had to sit on our hands during an animated conversation, we would immediately become mute.)

The wisdom and resourcefulness of my eleven-year-old Sweet One, is well, the wisdom of an eleven-year-old. Sweet One talked Wee One out of the balloons and tied them to Absolute Favorite Dolly in the Whole Wide World. No great surprise what transpired next.

Both girls were in the living room with twenty-plus feet of cathedral ceiling and Favorite Dolly tied to multiple helium balloons. As soon as Sweet One secured the last balloon to the doll, she put the doll on the sofa, then turned back to her sister and the treat bag.

In horror, Wee One immediately began screaming and jumping as she watched Absolute Favorite Dolly in the Whole Wide World float to the ceiling. Sweet One had been too engrossed in the treats to notice the floating doll, until it was well beyond her reach.

At the sound of Wee One and her hysterics, I came running to see what was the problem. After a brief interrogation, Sweet One explained what happened and I attempted to soothe and calm Wee One. However, the brief science and physics lesson was lost on her when she realized I was trying to tell her it would be a COUPLE OF DAYS before dolly would come back down.

At that point, Wee One became inconsolable.

Translation: My life had just become a living hell and I had guests arriving for a dinner party within an hour.

Solution: One Daisy Red Ryder BB Gun.

Because most of the balloons were mylar and did not “pop,” I had to shoot a couple of them and wait before Absolute Favorite Dolly in the Whole Wide World slowly made her way back to earth and into the arms of my Wee One.

Wee One was back to her cheery self by the time my guests arrived. She greeted them with her doll and proudly told each one: Mommy’s been shooting guns in the house…

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