June 07, 2005

Sisters

Sweet One is eight years older than Wee One.

A myriad of things arise from this discrepancy in age.

Two of the most pronounced are the responsibilities Sweet One "naturally" undertakes as an older child and my seemingly laid-back approach to parenting, particularly when compared to my behavior the first time around.

While still very anal and overprotective of both my girls, I notice I have mellowed (God, I hate that word) and do not take the small things quite as seriously as I once did. With Wee One, I am more likely to let her test her wings and learn those life lessons without interference from me.

With Sweet One I hovered constantly and did everything I possibly could to protect her from everything. Both girls have benefitted from this bit more relaxed approach.

As to Sweet One assuming some responsibility for her much younger sister, I am aware she is still a child in her own right, but a certain amount of "caring" for others is good for her. Likewise, too much responsibility may threaten to rob her of her childhood.

Ever aware of that balance, I try to temper my requests of Sweet One in relation to the four-year-old.

Yesterday, Sweet One and I sat on the mezzanine over-looking the gym floor while Wee One was in her gymnastic class. Wee One was infectiously cute as she jumped on the trampoline, bopped along the balance beam, and tumbled from one end of the huge mat to the other. She was also cognizant of our location and frequently looked over with a wave to ensure we were watching.

In those moments I was unexpectedly overwhelmed with love for both my children. Sweet One watched her sister with pride and delight. She took great pleasure in the little one's antics and accomplishments.

The sheer adoration on her face for Wee One is not something I hope to ever forget, regardless of what days I have left on this earth.

No matter what challenges face me, I am truly blessed.

Posted by Christina at June 7, 2005 01:02 PM

Comments

Yes, you are!!!

Posted by: Yabu at June 7, 2005 03:56 PM

By the time you have 4 or 5 kids you forget about protecting them and look for protection from them!

Posted by: livey at June 7, 2005 04:08 PM

(Sniff) No, it's alright...I've just got something in my eye, that's all....(sniff)

Posted by: Robert the Llama Butcher at June 7, 2005 04:56 PM

OH just damn! That's too sweet for words;-)

Posted by: sadie at June 7, 2005 06:31 PM

You are indeed Blessed, you and your sistah both are...
hmm suggest you take a look at post of mine titled "A Blogger A to Z" it may have potentional then again maybe It will fall flat..
*bows* to the feisty one.

Posted by: Gopher at June 7, 2005 06:36 PM

Yep. It's as I told Dana -- there will come a day when you realize that you actually LIKE your children for the people they have become (not just love them for the fact that they are your babies). . .and it is a feeling much like you describe here.

I knew the second their scrawnly, squalling bodies were placed in my arms -- I was meant to be their mother; and my life would never, ever be the same.

I, too, am blessed. Thank you for the reminder.

xoxo

Posted by: Margi at June 7, 2005 06:36 PM

awww! you're definitely blessed -- just as the rest of us are definitely blessed by having you in our lives!

Posted by: amelie at June 7, 2005 09:07 PM

I think that for 99.9% of parents, hovering over the first one and being so anxious to do everything right is quite natural. Then if you have a second one... it does mellow you out - since you've done it before and realize that maybe you don't have to hover quite so much. It also relaxes you a bit where the older child is concerned because you realize they can weather a few storms without wilting.

We would have to worry if you DIDN'T mellow a bit. *grin*

Posted by: Teresa at June 7, 2005 09:08 PM

What happens if you are mellow to begin with? My friends, family and people i don't know usually express dismay over the fact that I am a laid-back parent. I keep a watchful eye, but I have a boy and my philosophy is to allow him to spread his wings early, tackle challenges head on and come to me in need of comfort (or I too him when in need of play). He doesn't get injured, usually, nor ingest foul substance, but he runs and jumps and tumbles and crashes with boy-abandon. He loves life, and I love that he loves life. I suspect that if I had a girl, I would probably hover a bit.

My feisty friend, you are blessed, and have raised wonderful children that will continue to heap blessings upon you for years to come.

Posted by: Oddybobo at June 8, 2005 07:45 AM

Our two girls are like that, too. Our Stoic (14) is very protective and even motherly sometimes with the Planner (7), but at other times they play, cut up, and generally have a good time together.

And, of course, our young one just *has* to do everything her big sister does -- gets quite upset, at times, when Mom & Dad do not agree with her on that.

There are times when they don't get along, but most of the time they just *adore* one another.

It truly is a blessing to have children like that . . .

Thank you for sharing with us, Christina.

Posted by: Dave at June 8, 2005 08:34 AM

Yes, kids can be a blessing in disguise. The best part of it all is when the kids grow up and actually become your friend! I have 4 and cherish each one as a child and a friend.

Posted by: Michele at June 8, 2005 08:47 AM

That is so, SO wonderful....er, but just wait until Wee One wants to borrow some of her older sister's fashionable clothes! LOL. Just kidding. They really do sound like they are growing very close, and if that relationship get rocky during the teen years, they'll undoubtedly be best friends for life as they grow and look back on things. They definitely have one incredible thing in common: a great, feisty, loving Mom. ;)

Posted by: WillyShake at June 8, 2005 02:30 PM

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