Feisty Repartee

Is that skin you are wearing?

This week's daringly demystifying diva topic is particularly timely with the long days of summer upon us.

What is appropriate swim wear?

Well, unless you are a man swimming with little inquisitive fishies in open water which like to nip at certain unmentionables, irrespective of how small or benign appearing, I do not believe a swimsuit is actually necessary to swim; however, if one is lounging, sun-bathing or otherwise wandering about a body of water, some form of cover up is required in most circumstances.

I realize some of you out there might actually be between the ages of nineteen and twenty-two and have bodies that look fabulous in whatever you choose to wear or not wear; however, we are all not so fortunate. I will be thirty-eight at the end of the month and acknowledge that my body is infinitely more appealing if certain parts of it are covered, at least in the harsh glare of the noonday sun.

As such, please let me say, thongs and speedos are attractive on a minuscule percentage of the population at large. If you have to ask another living soul: "Does this make my butt or stomach look big?" You are not in that percentile. Thank you.

The girls and I have access to one of THE premier water parks in the world. For years I have insisted their father take them because the thought of parading around all day in a swimsuit with several thousand other humans did not sound much like a glorious activity. Last summer I finally broke down and allowed myself to be dragged through the water park.

What did I find?

Heh.

Well, for one thing, that place is an absolute blast!

Secondly, while there were nubile young thangs running around with wild abandon, particularly in their choices of swim wear, there were far more staid individuals letting it all bulge out, hang out, and down-right flop for all the world to see.

After the first ten minutes of absolute shock, I spent the rest of the day singing quietly to myself: "I feel pretty, oh, so pretty..."

My advice on swim wear: Be yourself. Wear what makes you comfortable, both aesthetically and physically. There will always be more attractive and less attractive humans wherever you go.

For those naturalists out there, good for you.

As the ladies and dashing gentlemen cohorts in crime chime in, I will update with their thoughts on the matter. The delightful Kate (who had a birthday yesterday) will be guest posting as a Diva-esque lady.

Who knows, we may even see pictures.

Diva-esque Lady Kate takes on some key factors: age, weight, and grooming and even links to some (maybe not work-safe images!)

The Sassy Diva takes on Teensy Weensy Man Thongs? Ummmm, with pictures!

The Foreign Minister of Naked Villainy may well have the quote of the day: "I much prefer what is in the swim wear than the garment itself." And, there's more.

The Fabulous Kathy makes that saying of "Great Minds..." come to mind.

Phin swims by with The Right to Bear Arms...

Soulful Sexy Sadie says it all with Teeny Weenies

Back to Main