April 17, 2005


So, ummm, how do you like your eggs?

Over-easy, poached, soft-boiled, fried?

For anyone who saw Julia Roberts (not my favorite) a few years ago in Runaway Bride, the character she played had a tendency to morph into a woman whose likes and dislikes were based primarily on her love interest at the time. Her awakening to the road of self-discovery began when she realized she was unable to decide how she liked her eggs.

Me, I like Eggs Benedict with Hollandaise sauce if someone else is preparing it for me. If I have to cook, then it's over-easy with lightly toasted French bread, real butter, Mayhaw jelly, and at least two slices of bacon. Who cares if, after all that, I am unable to eat for the rest of the day? It's the breakfast of this champion.

Eggs are just one subject on which we can each express a preference. For Roberts' character in the movie, her ability to decide for herself on a choice of eggs marked her emergence as an individual in touch with who and what she was.

If only it were that simple.

If only announcing "I like my eggs soft boiled or poached" catapulted us onto that plane of self-awareness.

Life is not the movies. Life is, well, life.

This brings me to the real issue: How well do we really know ourselves?

We may know some things about our likes and dislikes. I love the taste of strawberries, but am not wild about papaya, but that is not to what I am referring. Knowing ourselves involves an understanding of who and what we are, as well as what motivates us to do what we do.

I am fortunate to have someone, a friend I greatly admire, who is unafraid to kick me in the pants when I desperately need it. This friend asked me who I am, not with respect to my relationships with others, but who is this person inside.

Hearing the question resonate deep within my soul, I initially drew a blank. I had not a clue of the stranger within me.

Take away the labels of mother, attorney, wife, friend, or whatever, and I was left with just me. But, who is me? And, how does one go about defining and articulating something that simply is?

Without a doubt, I am perfectly capable of delineating what it is I like and dislike. But, surely, there must be more to me than that.

Then, are we or do we become limited by the terms we use to describe ourselves?

We are more than the sum of our motivations and desires. We are also shaped by our own unique and collective experiences.

I'm still working on the "getting my head on straight" part and deeply appreciate the very kind and thoughtful support from each of you who commented and sent emails. To my way of thinking, all this is a journey.

As far as Feisty is concerned, each of you is certainly welcome to come along and see where all this takes us. I'm so very glad to have the company.

Thank you.

Posted by Christina at April 17, 2005 01:04 PM

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