July 29, 2005

Holy Crap!

Well, hell.

I just had the absolute crap scared out me.

A few weeks ago I reported there is a "pet" deer one of the neighbors has adopted.

A little while ago, the girls were in the back yard when the deer walked up to them. Of course, I was inside and not paying attention (bad mother that I am).

Sweet One let Wee One pet the doe, something they have been warned not to do; however, kids will be kids.

All was well and fine until the damn thing reared up and kicked my four-year-old in the face. She took a hoof to the inner part of her left eye between the brow and the bridge of her nose. One-half of an inch to the right and it could have taken her eye out.

Jesus Christ!

There's a scratch from her eye brow to her inner eye. The whole eye is swollen, but vision is intact. She'll probably have a shiner there tomorrow. Thank God it was not any worse.

My nerves are freakin' shot.

I think she is fine.

As we were getting her cleaned up and calmed down, between "ouchie...ouchie...OUCHIE!" she wanted to know if I was going to shoot that "stupid deer."

Make no mistake, I wish I could.

SATURDAY UPDATE: Wee One has a shiner and a scratch, but appears no worse for wear. She did tell me she's hungry for venison. As a matter of fact, so am I!

Many thanks for the words of concern and well wishes. They are very much appreciated.

Posted by Christina at July 29, 2005 06:33 PM

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Oy! I'm so glad she's Ok! Very scary!

Posted by: Dogsdontpurr at July 29, 2005 08:06 PM

Wow! Close call and, yes, it could have been tragic. Along with shiner might come a bit of understanding that when mama says, "Don't do X," mama has a good reason for saying it.

Glad it was just a few ouchies.

Posted by: Jim - PRS at July 29, 2005 08:34 PM

I hope your little one is okay.

Of note: In many states keeping a deer as a pet is illegal. They don't make good pets and will always be dangerous around children. Besides kicking, they can leave very nasty bites or simply run over and stomp a child or pet to death.

Ask any hunter about what happens to dogs (even very big dogs) that get too close to a deer while the deer is standing in a river.

Posted by: Billy The Blogging Poet at July 29, 2005 09:02 PM

Oh My! I'm glad Wee One is okay. Be sure to keep an eye out on her for a concussion too.

Posted by: Beth at July 29, 2005 09:37 PM

Now you scared the crap out of me.


Imagine explaining that to the grandparents.

Take Care

Posted by: Blogin Idiot at July 29, 2005 10:13 PM

Winchester 1300.


Posted by: Yabu at July 29, 2005 10:22 PM

Poor Wee One! Thank God she is ok. {{{hugs}}}

Posted by: Kate at July 29, 2005 11:13 PM

Subsonic ammo. Since the projectile does not break the sound barrier, it's not very loud. On the order of a paintball gun, as I recall.

Oh wait -- this isn't Kim DuDoit's? Sorry, wrong blog!

Posted by: Ranten N. Raven at July 29, 2005 11:20 PM

Venison... it's what's for dinner.

Glad Wee One's okay. Damn deer.

Posted by: That 1 Guy at July 30, 2005 12:47 AM

thank goodness she's alright! hugs all around, except to the deer [i don't want to add a shiner of my own; then you'd have TWO daughters to worry about! ; )]

Posted by: amelie at July 30, 2005 01:14 AM

Oh my goodness...how very frightening! I'm glad your wee one is OK (and hope mommy will recover soon too)!

Posted by: Barbara at July 30, 2005 03:02 AM

!!!!!!!!!! absolutely terrifying. I do hope she's alright--you too, Christina!

Posted by: WillyShake at July 30, 2005 06:01 AM

Oh bless her cottons, I'm glad she is alright!

Posted by: silk at July 30, 2005 06:09 AM

Glad she's okay.
Sure you can't shoot the deer, but how 'bout a stray arrow...

Posted by: phin at July 30, 2005 07:53 AM

Sheeeeeesh! I'm really glad that Wee One is okay! Venison in next week's Carnival Of The Recipes?

fyi...carefully-aimed slingshot usage would seem to "teach" the deer the appropriate boundaries without actually killing it. Plus you'd have some measure of satisfaction. Finally it's a game the whole family can enjoy. Nice, eh? Another win-win situation from Diplomat Zonker. (You should see my solution to that mess in the Middle East.)

Posted by: zonker at July 30, 2005 08:25 AM

Well boy howdy. I thought gettin' cleated was bad. Much less getttin cleated by a damned deer!

I'm glad erybody's ok. A lesson was probably learned, like most of us have to learn 'em. The hard way.

I could swear I saw that dear eatin' my soybeans... I shoulda done what I coulda done.

Maybe you ought to get her a Ted Nugent fan club membership... She's shoot first and ask questions later after that I'm sure.

Oh, one more thing, the ladies at work are all crazy about this stuff call "Belvedere". I hear it'll cure what ails ya.(No personal experience though)

Posted by: RedNeck at July 30, 2005 09:42 AM

.. ouch.. time for some payback, I'd say...

Posted by: Eric at July 30, 2005 01:28 PM

I'm glad your kid is alright. You're nicer then I am, I would have contacted animal control to report the neighbor. In Illinois I believe it is illegal to have a deer as a pet unless you are a wild life refuge. If they wouldn't have done anything. Then I think the deer and my musket would have a close encounter of the shattered skull kind.

But I'm over protective.

Posted by: Contagion at July 30, 2005 01:41 PM

Good gawd, what a scare!! Glad everything is okay, those little hoofs can be like razors!

Posted by: Michele at July 30, 2005 02:20 PM

Such profanity! Tsk tsk.

Give her a kiss from weird ol' aunt sadie;-)

Posted by: sadie at July 30, 2005 02:26 PM

I like Zonkers slingshot idea. I'm glad she is okay.

Posted by: Barbie at July 30, 2005 03:06 PM

Seriously consider calling the appropriate govt agency to remove the animal. Your daughter is lucky to have got off with a shiner. The next child in the nieghborhood might not be so lucky.

Posted by: kevinM at July 30, 2005 03:30 PM

Don't forget to check for ticks. Can you say Lyme Disease?

A deer from the wild is likely to harbor some sort of disease or another you might not want to catch, so wear gloves and wash up when you clean the carcass after whatever accident befalls Bambi. Proper processing of the animal products is important once you completed butchering the beast.

I recommend a quick club to the head since the thing is "tame" and then slit its throat. This should provide adequate entertainment to the participants who desire "revenge."

If done at night, you should have sufficient cover to complete the deed in a stealthy manner. A Voodoo ceremony is optional to place a hex on the neighbors, but highly recommended. If you know any reanimators, you could even invoke a zombie using the animal's blood to annoy the neighbors for a while.

However, kids should also be counselled that their mis-step in allowing the animal access to harm them now has an adverse effect upon the animal as well. When a kid teases a dog or handles it wrong, the dog bites (something that can happen to even the most well-trained or well mannered canine), and then the dog has to be put down, its a sad day that could have been avoided if the human involved had been more responsible. They need to realize that if something happens to Bambi now, they shoulder a part of the responsibility. And use the lesson when interacting with other animals that are not already socialized with them.

Posted by: epador at July 30, 2005 08:54 PM

Now I have to find that lunch box for the little cutie. So glad she is alright. Shoot the deer, screw out-of-season, call it retribution.

Posted by: oddybobo at July 31, 2005 12:12 AM

{{Hugs}} glad to hear she is doing fine.

Posted by: vw bug at July 31, 2005 09:47 AM

Beware of Bambi!

Posted by: WitNit at July 31, 2005 10:02 AM

Glad Wee One is okay.. hmm now if you were to accidently back into it or something. I can happen.
Love the slingshot idea but I think the voodoo bit is going a bit far. Can't say I like venison much too rich for my liking (maybe it's just me). **Hugs to Wee One** hmm now where did I put my rock salt shotgun carts...

Posted by: Gopher at July 31, 2005 05:11 PM

Oh goodness me. I'm so glad it was only ouchies. Good to hear she is ok.

Posted by: Moogie at August 1, 2005 11:20 AM

asdkljgnfalksdjgn! you can't have a pet deer! what a crazy thing to even attempt!

so glad the little one is ok though!

Posted by: Stigmata at August 1, 2005 03:15 PM

Wow, I'm behind on my reading. I'm so glad that Wee One is no worse for wear. I hope she heals quickly!!

Posted by: Jenn at August 4, 2005 03:44 PM

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